U.S. man claims to be pregnant

"This whole process, from trying to get pregnant to being pregnant, has been a challenge for us. The first doctor we approached was a reproductive endocrinologist. He was shocked by our situation and told me to shave my facial hair. After a $300 consultation, he reluctantly performed my initial checkups. He then required us to see the clinic’s psychologist to see if we were fit to bring a child into this world and consulted with the ethics board of his hospital. A few months and a couple thousand dollars later, he told us that he would no longer treat us, saying he and his staff felt uncomfortable working with “someone like me.”"

This is really sad. They're more concerned about the gender change than they are about the man's health and the health of his baby...WTF makes them think this couple would NOT be stable enough to have kids? How DARE they judge like that!

To these too-expensive doctors, I say "get over yourself!" These are human beings, you dingbats! What happened to your hippocratic oath? Suddenly got too hard to uphold?

Via docjeff.

This information is from Ron Paul's website. A Google search turned up tons more.

The Survey is ridiculously intrusive. The data will be sold to private businesses. Worst of all, the U.S. taxpaying base is paying for this mandatory intrusion.

It is not being covered by mainstream news, so we need to get word out via blog, word-of-mouth, and email.

Contact your congresscritters!

NPR's Melissa Block was in the midst of an interview when the earthquake struck central China.

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=90366623

Can we really call it a subset of society anymore? This occurred in Great Britain:

Pictured: The moment award-winning garden is destroyed after hundreds respond to Facebook water fight

Obviously my focus was optimistically short.

I have been observing, and occasionally participating in, the shenanigans going on with a certain subset of LJers concerning the LJ Advisory Board elections. I've been ruminating on how best to summarize just what it is about this group that bothers me the most.

First of all, they are representative of a larger subset of society. This subset is characterized by several things, including being perfectly brainwashed by the Korporate Media. They are avid consumers and their list of concerns would be considered very shallow by anyone who has sought a deeper meaning in life. Many are concerned with having the latest electronic gadget, or going to the best clubs, drinking the best drinks, wearing the best clothes, etc.

Many adults are more than familiar with the sense of entitlement children can have, even well into their teens. It is a part of the territory, so to speak. But what do you say when the same individuals carry that sense of entitlement well into their adult years? We're talking people who are into their thirties and beyond who are still displaying the same attitudes they had when in their teens to early twenties.

One of those senses of entitlement has to do with the idea of Free Speech. The First Amendment is a great thing, and sometimes it's hard to tolerate how others exercise this right, but it is a right all of us in the United States share. However, as has been amply demonstrated, especially with certain legislation and law being passed against things like Hate Speech, there are limits. These limits are set by the general mores of society.

What are these mores? Well, I'd venture to say that one of them encompasses the Golden Rule. Unfortunately we have seen a steady decline in the practice of this, especially over the last eight years spent watching our own government mistreat it's own citizens as though they have no more value than a slab of meat. We won't even go into what they have done to folks in other countries; a good look at the daily headlines more than fills that need.

Corporations regularily screw the regular citizen. They lower wages, they cut benefits, they up hours, they expect a lot from their employees while at the same time continuously cutting what they give in return. The biggest violation in this category - a blatant example of corporations putting profit over people - is the rapid deployment of many jobs overseas, where grateful workers in third-world countries will work for a fraction of what your average American needs to survive - and they are grateful, because they are used to a median income that wouldn't get most of us through an average month.

So, what are we being taught? Screw over your neighbor and get as much as you can - with as little consequence as possible.

See, Free Speech is great, but the one thing this subset of society forgets is that there are always consequences for your actions. If you set forth with the intentions of bettering the situation, not only for yourself and your famiy, but also those around you, then (in most cases) the consequences are good ones. The opposite is also true, and this is where people like myself and this subset of society split - if you set forth with the intentions of gratifying yourself with no concern for those around you, the consequences are, out of necessity, going to be unpleasant for you.

I have witnessed a lot - and I mean a LOT - of pissing, bitching, and moaning, from this particular set of LJers, when they spew forth something intended to harm, and then find themselves banned from the journal or community they chose to spew within.

Welcome to the idea of action and reaction folks. You DO reap what you sow.

True Free Speech comes with responsibility, and that's the responsibility you accept as a result of your choices and actions. You cannot excise responsibility from the mix, and if you try, others in society are more than willing to step up and shove it right back in your face.

This subset, with its entitled attitude, always has a large problem when being forced to face consequences which do not inherently benefit them. They take on the role of victim, as though the rest of society is expected to put up with their shit, no matter what.

Sorry, but the rest of us are not obligated to entertain, put up with, or support your shit.

People like this also display the characteristic of having nothing truly meaningful as a goal or belief in their lives. They blithely sail through life, acting as though the world is here to entertain them and to serve them. This is a childish attitude, and I do not use that term in a derogatory manner. Children, by nature of survival, HAVE to have this attitude. One of the jobs of a parent is raising the child to be independent and self-sustaining, thereby slowly "training out" the sense of entitlement.

Then why do we have so many who still possess this attitude? If you follow routine psychology, you'd likely look at their parents, and the way these people were raised. I also happen to believe the "Korporate Konsumerist Society" we're all being subjected to encourages the continuation of this otherwise childish attitude.

"We're Americans! We deserve it! Let's go and buy it!"

When a person reaches the age of 18, and especially the age of 21, they are expected, by most, to be ready to make their way in life, independent of the heavy support they received from their parents, prior to those ages. Yes, I am speaking in generalities, because any one of us can cite plenty of examples where the parenting environment went dysfunctionally all wrong, and failed to accomplish this goal. However, for the sake of argument, we will assume that the average young adult has received the necessary parenting to get them to this point.

The Bill of Rights isn't just a piece of paper with a set of entitlements written upon it. Those Rights were fought for, thought out, and set down with the idea of common consideration for everyone in the society - not just a few. It was assumed that any adult reading and exercising these rights would do so with common mores such as basic consideration influencing their actions.

Unfortunately, in this day and age, quite a few folks need reminders that Rights come with Responsibility - and if you try to abdicate the responsibility, others in society are more than willing to make sure the ball stays right in your court, where it belongs.

Life isn't about getting the latest gadget or drinking the latest drinks or getting the most lulz. It's about growing as a person, learning how to become an integral and productive member of society, and caring for those less fortunate than yourself. It's about finding a meaningful purpose and attending to that purpose.

The subset is quick to make snap judgments on other people while, amazingly enough, having little to no basis of knowledge. For instance, I hear a lot of smack talk about my being on full disability. Some of these people have called me a slacker and a drain on society.

One. These statements clearly illustrate how little they know about the economic system they are all supposedly participating in. They have no clue HOW someone gets disability in the first place, or what is required, or how deliberately hard the "system" makes the process. If they ever found themselves suddenly in the position of being physically or mentally unable to continue working, whether this comes from an accident of some sort or a disease, they wouldn't know the first thing about how to get that disability for themselves. Responsible, mature adults take the time to learn the system, so if they ever DO get to that point, they already know what to expect. Folks with entitlement issues don't seem to think they need to learn this stuff - either for their own future use, or to understand others better. Others are expected to give them this information without them seeking it out.

Sorry kids, but you can't just decide one day that you can't work anymore, fill out some paperwork, and get on the dole. It is far harder and more complicated than that.

If you want full disability, you have to work 40 quarters and pay into the Social Security System. Do you know what a "quarter" is? If you are unable to work a complete 40 quarters, then you become eligible for Supplemental Security Income, or SSI.

In both cases, you need overwhelming evidence from a team - not just one, a TEAM - of physicians that clearly documents what is wrong with you. This evidence is then held up to a predetermined scale which "grades" just how disabled you really are. If your conditions don't quite fit this scale, then you have quite the fight on your hands. Even if there's no doubt, they will almost unilaterally turn you down the first time, forcing you to retain a disability lawyer for an appeal.

I am personally aware of several people who, if you met them, would definitely look like they deserve disability. In fact, most of them have that overwhelming mountain of evidence from physicians. Some of them are STILL not receiving the benefits they are entitled to.

Now that you have a better idea of what's required, one can hope that you'll be a little less judgmental, at least when it comes to recipients of disability income. Nobody just "hands" it to you.

One characteristic of this subset I've been speaking about is a very sociopathic one: They appear to lack empathy for anyone not within their circle of family, friends, or acquaintances, and if one of those people happens to stop "serving the ego" of the individual, they will find themselves 'outside in the cold' with the rest of society.

Anyone not within this "circle" is considered fair game; they could become a dumping-ground for frustrations, or be objectified for the perverse amusement of the "members".

For me, this is the second time I've run across a subset online that displayed this disturbing characteristic. It disturbs me, because I believe it is not as isolated as one would hope - and the people displaying this characteristic are our future businesspeople and politicians.

Hell, some of them are already in position of influence and power.

For a society to really work, there has to be a set of mores that everyone is expected to adhere to - and if they don't, they are shunned, shamed, or otherwise forced to adhere. What I see, now, is American society adapting the impersonal nature of the Corporation. Worse than that, I see Americans allowing themselves to become nothing but cogs in the Big Machine. America is no longer known for ingenuity and humanitarian attitudes.

If you truly want to stand out - if you truly want to be different - then try caring for your fellow human being, for a change. Display some chilvalry, courtesy, and empathy. When tempted to judge, take the time to learn more about the situation rather than engaging in the instant gratification of a snap judgment. Find a purpose in life, something to really care about, that won't simply pander to your ego, but that will make a true difference. You can still have the lulz but this time it won't be at the expense of others.

WARNING: Not for the faint-of-heart nor those easily triggered.

Canada WSIB Workplace Safety Ads

It's really too bad the media doesn't have the guts to run ads like these in the U.S. - a lot of companies cut back on safety and a lot of people end up as casualties.

Listen -- Allow the survivor to talk about what happened without giving advice.

Believe -- Let survivor know you believe an attack occurred.

Validate -- Let survivor know that reactions to sexual assault vary widely from individual to individual and over time.

Watch body language/proximity -- Sometimes physical contact can cause discomfort and flashbacks. Sit at a comfortable distance, maintain eye contact and nod to indicate you are paying attention.

Be patient -- Do not pressure survivor to be "normal" again. Encourage survivor to move at own pace.

Some helpful statements:

• I believe you.
• This is not your fault.
• I am so sorry that this happened.
• You did not deserve this.
• That sounds like a scary situation.
• I am so happy that you are safe and that you are here to talk with me about this.
• Thank you for being brave/comfortable enough to talk with me about this.
• How can I help you right now?
• You sound overwhelmed right now. Try taking a deep breath.
• You are having a normal response to an abnormal situation.

Source: Cleveland Rape Crisis Center

Source

At home
• Keep entrances well lighted.
• Check the identification of any sales or service persons before letting them in. Ask for a photo ID.
• Equip your home with peepholes, deadbolts and chain locks. If you have a child, add a second peephole at eye level.
• Never give the impression that you are at home alone if strangers telephone or come to your door. Advise your children to do the same.
• Keep outside bushes and shrubbery trimmed. Plant defensive shrubbery, with thorns and spiky leaves, beneath windows to thwart criminals.
• If you come home and find a door or window open or signs of forced entry, do not go in. Go to the nearest phone and call the police.

In your car
• Keep your car in good working order and gas tank at least half full. Make a practice of filling up your vehicle during the daylight hours.
• Always have your keys out and ready before leaving a building to approach your car.
• Look around and in your car, including front and rear seats and floor, before entering.
• Lock your car door immediately after entering the vehicle, even before putting the key into the ignition. Keep car doors locked until you safely reach your destination.
•Park in well-lighted areas and lock the doors, even if you'll be gone a short time. Check your surroundings before getting out of your car.
• If you are accosted in a parking lot, away from your own vehicle, consider rolling underneath a nearby auto. It is difficult to force anyone out from under a car.
• If an attacker does manage to get into your car while you are in it, do everything in your power to exit the automobile. If you are still behind the wheel, steer your vehicle into a barricade, a pole, a wall -- any object that will create a minor accident.
• Don't stop to assist a stranger whose car has broken down. Instead, help by driving to the nearest phone and calling police to help.
• If you get a flat tire, drive carefully on it until you reach a safe, well-lighted and well-traveled area. If necessary, better to ruin a tire than gamble with your safety.
• If you are involved in an accident, stay in your car until police arrive. In minor accidents where the other driver suggests you exchange insurance information, simply hold up your driver's license and insurance card against the window.
• If you are being followed, don't drive home. Go to the nearest police or fire station and honk your horn, or to an open business where you can safely call the police. Try to obtain the license plate number and description of the car following you.
• If possible, have a cellular phone in your car for use in emergencies.

Walking or jogging
• Always be alert to your surroundings and the people around you.
• Walk facing oncoming traffic, close to curb or on a sidewalk. A person walking with traffic can be followed, forced into a car, and abducted more easily than a person walking against traffic.
• Avoid doorways, bushes and alleys.
• Don't walk alone at night, and always avoid areas where there are few people.
• When people stop you for directions, stay far enough away from the car that you can turn and run easily.
• If you feel you are being followed, walk to a well-populated area.
• If you are in trouble, attract help any way you can. Scream, blow a whistle or yell for help.
• Trust your instincts. If a particular place, person or group of persons makes you feel uneasy, go a different direction.

The subject and the details may be triggering, but I am sharing this with the rest of you, because stories like these have to be told. It can happen to you...and that includes any men reading this.

Telling the story I tried to forget -- Beyond Rape: A Survivor's Journey, Part 1

Here is the top page, with all the parts:

BEYOND RAPE: A SURVIVOR'S JOURNEY

Rape isn't talked about enough. Women are still afraid to talk about their experiences, afraid to press criminal charges. Parents still have a hard time handling it if their child tells them s/he has been raped - especially if it is at the hands of a fellow relative or close friend. Others are still so uncomfortable that they turn the tables and make it the victim's fault.

Rape is not a crime of sex. Rape is a crime of power. Power over another, and humiliating another, objectifying them.

The more we know about it, the more prepared we are. The more we endeavor to make it easier for victims to speak out and get help, the more can be done about it.

Gah, this stuff is so pervasive in media it's downright sickening...

What If No One Were Fat?

Here's a really humorous, albeit serious, rip of that article:

Why is the US in a recession? Because of all the fat people, that's why!

Last but not least, here's a beautiful love letter to a large man:

Love letter to a fat man

One thing that occurred to me while I have been reading all this stuff...

People have been getting steadily larger over the decades. If you've ever been in a two-storey house built at or before the turn of the century, and you happen to be a taller person (let's say 5'8" or taller), you will quickly notice that some doorways and ceilings may be uncomfortably low for you - especially if the place has a basement. Something everyone will notice, unless they have tiny feet, is the stair risers are not only shorter horizontally, but also shorter, vertically.

M told me the other day that the average height of an ancient Roman was 5'6". A part of the reason why the Celts often gave them a fright wasn't just due to their tendency to scream and run into battle naked covered in woad - it was because they were taller and bigger, as well.

The populace, in general, would thin out naturally if corporations would stop with the fucking High Fructose Corn Syrup. Why can't you use plain old cane sugar, honey, or fruit sucrose? Ohhh, I forgot. They COST more and all you give a flying shit about is your bottom line!

Be that as it may, humanity in general has been getting steadily bigger, especially those of us with Indo-European ancestry.

So BLECH on you fat haters! You might have some evolving to do :P

Here's the trailer:



Here's the site:

http://www.americathebeautifuldoc.com/

It is a documentary on America being obsessed with beauty.

---

LiveJournal Advisory Board Elections

I support shamangirl to be my representative on the Advisory Board.

Show your support at lj_election_en.

Source.

Forty-two percent of first, second and third grade girls want to lose weight. Collins, M. "Body figure perception and preferences among preadolescent children." International Journal of Eating Disorders 10 (1991), pp 199-208.

Forty-five percent of boys and girls in grades three through six want to be thinner. Thirty-seven percent have already dieted; seven percent score in the eating disorder range on a test of children's eating habits. Maloney, MJ, McGuire, J. Daniels, Sr., and Specker, B. "Dieting behavior and eating attitudes in children," Pediatrics 84 (1989) pp 482-487.

Forty-six percent of nine- to eleven-year-olds said they were sometimes or very often on diets. Gustafson-Larson, A. M., and Terry, R. D., "Weight-related behaviors and concerns of fourth grade children." Journal of the American Dietetic Assoc. 92 (7)(1992), pp 818-822.

During puberty, most girls' bodies need to gain, on average, ten inches and forty to fifty pounds, including more body fat. Friedman, Sandra Susan. When Girls Feel Fat: Helping Girls Through Adolescence. Firefly Books, 2000.

Females need seventeen percent body fat in order to menstruate for the first time and twenty-two percent to have regular cycles. Cooke, Kaz. Real Gorgeous: The Truth About Body and Beauty. Norton, 1996.

Seventy percent of normal weight girls in high school feel fat and are on a diet. Ferron, C. "Body Image in adolescence in cross-cultural research" Adolescence 32 (1997), pp. 735-745.

Over half of the females studied between ages eighteen and twenty-five would prefer to be run over by a truck than to be fat, and two-thirds would choose to be mean or stupid rather than fat. (Emphasis mine) Gaesser, Glenn A., PhD. Big Fat Lies: The truth about your weight and your health. Gurze Books, 2001.

A survey of college students found that they would prefer to marry an embezzler, drug user, shoplifter, or blind person than someone who is fat. Gaesser, Glenn A., PhD. Big Fat Lies: The truth about your weight and your health. Gurze Books, 2001.

Up to thirty-five percent of normal dieters will progress to pathological dieting and, of those, twenty to twenty-five percent will progress to partial or full-blown eating disorders. Shisslak, C.M., Crago, M., and Estes, L.S., "The spectrum of eating disturbances," Intl Journal of Eating Disorders 18 (3) (1995) pp. 209-219.

The death rate for eating disorders is five to twenty percent. American Psychiatric Association, "Practice Guidelines for Eating Disorders." American Journal of Psychiatry, 150(2) (1993) pp. 212-228.

Americans spend fifty billion dollars annually on diet products. (Emphasis mine; obviously, dieting is big business) Garner, David W., PhD, and Wooley, Susan C., PhD. "Confronting the Failure of Behavioral and Dietary Treatments for Obesity," Clinical Psychological Review 11 (1991), pp. 729-780.

Fifty billion dollars is more than the GNP (Gross National Product) of more than half of all the nations in the world, including the entire country of Ireland.

I have a pet peeve that will get me going at the drop of a hat. I simply cannot tolerate hatred of fat people. Yes, it does have something to do with my being 6 feet tall and 300 lbs., but that's not all of it.

I am sick, tired, and fed up with media's support of the anorexic body type as ideal. At least one part of media - modeling - is beginning to get away from that...models as anorexic as Kate Moss are often not being allowed to work.

M and I have a term for a healthy woman who has a normal amount of body fat - "plush". They're well-proportioned, and you wouldn't get stabbed with countless bones if you got intimate with them. I like "plush" women. I used to be one.

I won't go into all the details of how I find myself, at nearly 48 (in 8 days), at 300 lbs. Those who have been reading my blog for awhile know about most of my physical ailments, and for those that don't, take the time to read more of my journal. I am done with justifying why I'm this size.

Just to satisfy your curiosity, this is what I've eaten in the last 12 hours: One bowl of ramen soup, one breaded chicken breast, and one cherry turnover. That's pretty much standard fare for me unless we make a dinner for ourselves, and then you're talking a basic balanced meal - some meat, usually unadorned except for spices and light sauces, vegetables, and usually a small amount of pasta or a baked potato.

I won't try to tell you that I never eat fast food. I do, but it's not like I'm spending every day, or even every other day, binging on it. For one thing, we can't afford to do that. For another, I love my heart, and it's already suffered enough from necessary medications.

For every person like me who is willing to lay it out for others, there are hundreds of others that pass you (generic) by that aren't as forthcoming. How many times do you find yourself making faces or comments about them? How many times do you imagine they must be junk food junkies or always eating McDonalds?

Chances are they aren't doing any of those things...but I will tell you one thing they're probably doing, and it's the fault of the economy and government more than it is the individuals.

Complex carbohydrates are way cheaper to purchase in bulk than vegetables or meat. Those unlucky enough to find themselves on the lower end of the income scale - especially if they have kids - have little choice but to purchase mostly complex carbohydrates.

The food industry is also making it more and more difficult to afford fruits, vegetables and meat versus prepackaged garbage loaded to the gills with empty calories.

Most people would have to engage in a thoroughly ridiculous amount of exercise to combat a diet rich in complex carbs. When you consider that the same folks are probably working more than one job on top of taking care of kids, what makes you think they'd have the time for such a thing? Or the income to join a gym?

Most of the time, I, personally, have found that those who express hatred for fat people do so out of an ingrained fear of becoming fat, themselves. In many cases, this fear is entirely without basis. It drives me nuts to hear some healthy, well-proportioned person decry "oh I'm soooooo fat!" No, you are not fat, and you likely have no frigging clue what it is like to BE fat. Learn how to love yourself and stop sweating the small stuff.

Fat people rarely set out to become fat. Nine times out of ten there are serious, underlying reasons for a person's obesity (and you aren't truly obese till you are 50 or more pounds above your "ideal" weight). I know of many who are fat because they have critical self-esteem issues - the fat is an insulator against the pain caused by the outside world. Others have stress issues that manifest in high levels of hunger. Yet others have physical disabilities that make it hard, or impossible, to get the same sort of exercise a healthy person of their age is able to engage in.

Stop letting the media program you. Stop and take a look around. Are those fat people hurting you? Are they walking right over and punching you in the face, or robbing you, or otherwise harassing you?

THEN WHERE DO YOU GET OFF MAKING FUN OF THEM?

Chances are excellent there is much more to their story than you can glean in a mere seconds-long passing. I'm sure you wouldn't want someone making fun of YOU for some reason. Only YOU know, for certain, why you are in a particular set of circumstances.

I think it's bad enough that our very government is engaged in a massive hate campaign against innocents. Unfortunately, I feel it is a reflection of the hatred many face on a day-to-day basis. While there are certainly other types of hatred floating around that could be considered more severe, the hatred of fat people is so stupid it makes my head hurt.

The next time you're tempted to point fingers and say bad things about a fat person, stop and ask yourself why. If the reason is your own fear of becoming fat - keep your mouth shut and your fingers to yourself. You've got much more serious issues than that fat person likely has.

And yes, you CAN vote for more than one person!

I'm also running for the LJ Advisory Board and my post is here:

http://community.livejournal.com/lj_election_en/16581.html

Please take the time to vote for me. If you want to spread the word, you can paste the following code to your own LJ:

<div style="background-color:#fff; color:#213368; padding:10px; border:1px solid #213368; width:23.31em; height:6.88em; font-size:16px;clear:both;"><img style="float:left; width:6.25em; height:6.25em;"src="http://p-userpic.livejournal.com/74327005/15133486" alt="" /><div style="margin-left:6.88em;"><p style="font-weight:bold; font-size:0.88em;">LiveJournal Advisory Board Elections</p><p style="font-size:0.75em;">I support <lj user="shamangirl"> to be my representative on the Advisory Board.</p><p style="font-size:0.75em;"><a href="http://community.livejournal.com/lj_election_en/16581.html" target="_blank">Show your support</a> at <lj user="lj_election_en">.</p></div></div>

It looks like this: